AN INTERVIEW WITH LISA LAMPANELLI
Lisa Lampanelli, often referred to as “The Queen of Mean”, is coming to the Broome County Forum on September 12th at 8pm. She is best known for her hold-no-punches insults on Comedy Central Roast and undying love of big black cock- she has famously joked, "I've had more black dick in me than a urinal at the Apollo!"
But in our recent interview with Lampanelli, she shared a softer, more introspective side, and told Carousel what is important to her these days, and how she wants to use her experiences to provide the world with more than just laughs while becoming her healthiest, most authentic self.
I’m very interested in the fact that, before comedy, you got your start in journalism at Syracuse University! I actually did journalism until I was about thirty and the comedy bug bit me. It was bothering me in the back of my head that I hadn’t tried it yet, so I did. I was going to try it once and if there was no hope, I’d know it, but the first time I did it, it went great! So, thank God for the world, it worked!
What planted comedy in your head? I know you got your start in the 90s when the world wasn’t dripping with open mics, and there weren’t comedy contests at every corner like there are now. Yeah, it was after the 80s boom… and comedy wasn’t really doing that much. I think it was just something I pushed down and I was like, “well, you know, I really just want to try it.” I had to get to the point where I got up the nerve to do it. I think whenever you’re ready, you’re ready, and you can’t force it before then... Just like you can’t become a nurse just because there’s lots of nurses needed in four years when you get out of college.
I like that comparison with nursing. It takes passion to do both, because they can be pretty thankless and heart wrenching. Yeah, because with comedy you’re really not going to make any money for about seven, eight years, so you have to just know you’re doing it for the right reason. And I always say to people picking careers based on what’s practical, “I mean, you’re not gonna like it! And yes, it may not line up and work like it did for me, but if you don’t have the passion first then it’s kind of just really empty.”
In your very early days at a comedy club in Virginia, the manager told you not to say “pussy” on stage, so the very first thing you said when you got on stage was, “Some asshole said I couldn’t say ‘pussy’!” Whatever you tell a comic not to do, we’re gonna do first. Unless you really, really respect the person. When we’re doing the Comedy Central Roast, and there’s one subject that the roastee doesn’t want you to touch, I respect that and say, okay, they’re volunteering to do this, it’s for charity, I’m obviously going to respect them for putting themselves in that position. But if it’s a club owner who arbitrarily picks something? No. I’d rather not work for them.
When you were developing your act, did you start blue (profane), or was that something that you found along the way? Ever since I was a kid, I loved to curse. I was a big curser. I just was talking like myself. It wasn’t even a choice. Audiences like when you’re yourself up there… when you seem like you’re being really genuine. So, if I made a huge effort to not curse, that would look phony and disingenuous and people would not be drawn to me. So I just was being me!
But you have a reputation for being a nice person off stage. When you talk about somebody like me, or- not that I’m even in this kind of company- but, Howard Stern or Don Rickles, people who get all of it out on stage don’t have to get it out in real life... That being said, I do have anger issues that I work on; I do get my feelings hurt easily, which I work on. I, for about a month now, haven’t cursed offstage anymore, because I decided offstage it’s kind of a wall to keep people away and I’d rather let people in. So, I still say whatever I want on stage… but I think we’re different onstage than offstage and it’s kind of nice to know there’s a contrast.
I know that you’ve been doing more soul searching lately, that you’re looking for more meaningful connections with people. Do you find that your position as an entertainer gets in the way of that? I’m not recognized as much anymore because of the weight loss and haircut and everything. That wasn’t to make myself unrecognizable, it was just to do my thing and shed a lot of unhealthiness and unhealthy weight. I just wanted to live longer. I’ve never found the career, or the onstage persona, to get in the way of someone getting to know me. I’m the only one who got in the way of that… putting walls up, being too jokey, cursing too much, not being authentic, not letting people in, and I think those things are falling away now. Since the divorce [from husband since 2010, Jimmy Cannizzaro] is final in a couple months, I feel like there’s just a real certainty in me knowing that whoever I am is coming out for real now offstage, and it’s going to attract the people it’s going to attract. I need a real soul connection with someone. I need someone who’s very charitable and works on themself and has a strong spiritual base, and I just know in my gut that type of thing happens naturally, and you don’t force it, so yeah, I’m not worried about all that.
Do you think that working on this personal stuff might affect your artistic ability? They say once John Lennon got clean the music wasn’t as good anymore. But who’s “they?” Who’s judging it? I’ve had people say to me, “Now that you’re thin, you won’t be funny anymore.” I’ve gotten more standing ovations in the past year than I ever had! And they’re like, “Well, Jonah Hill’s not funny.” Yeah, but he got nominated for two Oscars. Which would you rather be? And he also, by the way, is still funny… So, the fact is, I don’t listen to anyone… I’m a pretty good judge of what’s good and bad in my own act and in myself… I just in my gut know that I’m freer and funnier than ever and I think freedom is what makes you funny.
I want to change gears a little and ask you about your LGBTQ advocacy. I’m not sure if you know this, but Binghamton is a pretty gay friendly city- Oh! That’s exciting... I didn’t know that!
I know that’s something you’re passionate about. I love that you donated $50,000 to Gay Men’s Health Crisis in reaction to threats from the Westboro Baptist Church in Topeka Kansas. How did that come about? I was on Twitter one day and I saw that they were threatening me physically, so I got a little scared… I’m a wuss, I had never gotten in a fight in my life; I had never been hit or hit anybody. We got security, but then I’m like, if I’m feeling this kind of fear one day out of 53 years, imagine how people who are gay bashed feel... So, I put something out there: “… If any of those guys protest me, I’m gonna give $1,000 to a gay charity of my choice.” At the time I did a lot of work with GHMC. I figured that would scare the protesters off of coming, but they figured, ooh, we’ll really screw her over and send forty eight people. And honestly, in my position, if that’s what I have to part with to make a lesson to these people, that ha-ha, now you helped get gay people $50,000, then that’s fine with me, because I can go and do a show and earn that. So, that was very cool, man! I was very happy so many showed up! I joke around and I’m like, “Oh my God! I thought twenty were gonna show up and then fifty came!” But, it’s cool that they did, because I know that bought a lot of meals for those people, and it was just a good way of sticking it to them and putting my money where their mouth is.
You’ve been branching out from standup. You’ve done some work on Broadway with a one-woman show, and you’ve been on The Celebrity Apprentice. Do you have any other aspirations floating around in the back of your head? The Broadway show is a one-person show that’s scheduled hopefully for this fall. I hope to do that, because it’s really a relevant show to people working on weight and food and body issues and addictions, so it’s very much about helping yourself and not stopping until you really work on your demons, and not just letting yourself skate through life... So, that’s a really cool show: Fat Girl Interrupted. I think I’ve achieved enough; I think I’ve taken my foot off the pedal when it comes to achieving. I think I’m done with doing anything that’s not fun because I have to… I could see myself in a few years saying, “Okay, I’ve had enough of this. How am I going to switch this over to being more about motivating people or help for people who have these problems and addictions and things?” I could see a shift towards motivational stuff, but that will just develop as I go along without forcing it.
What can audiences expect when you come to the Broome County Forum September 12th? I’m doing a new one-hour special; I haven’t done one of them in about three years. I just put it together, so it’s 100% new material no one’s ever seen on TV… and it’s so good! It’s all really personal, it’s all about the divorce, it’s all about the weight loss, and this journey… Oh! And a lot about The Apprentice! I’m really excited because I think this is the most genuine so far. I really like it!
Lisa Lampanelli takes the stage at Binghamton’s Forum Theatre (236 Washington St.) at 8pm on Friday, September 12th. Tickets range from $35-$65, and can be purchased at the Arena Box Office or online through Ticketmaster. For more info on Lisa Lampanelli, check out insultcomic.com.
